This question came to mind the other day, and I’d like to talk it through with you. I’m not sure if it’s going to make a load of sense as my own thoughts have been all over the place lately, but, is it really possible to be – or to become – a mood blogger?! I’m a mood reader, so I guess it’s not that hard to think that blogging could follow along in the same vein?
We all have to force ourselves to do things we’re not in the mood to do, but the one thing I can’t force – and believe me, I’ve tried – is being able to write. Anytime I do try it sends my thoughts into overdrive and I manage to think of every single thing I need to do that doesn’t involve writing, and by extension, blogging. All these thoughts come flooding in and they will. Not. Go. Away!
I swear, some days my thoughts really do resemble Jabberjays.
I know that I need to be in specific moods to tackle different blogging tasks. Take review writing. I need to have a completely different mind-set when I sit down to write a review than I would if I’m writing a Top Ten Tuesday post, for example. I feel like I’ve placed this unspoken need to be professional on myself when it comes to reviews, and sometimes I feel like I’m not letting my personality show through enough. It’s always how I’ve written reviews, and in a way, I feel like I’ve begun overthinking how I write them, instead of just writing.
And it’s not just with reviews, but with commenting as well. I’m a naturally shy person, and it takes a lot of inner pep talking for me to get the confidence to comment, comment, comment! I know I should just DO IT, but that’s always a lot easier said than done. Then my overactive brain latches on to the need to leave meaningful comments, and that lovely inner voice insists that every possible comment I could leave completely sucks, and it’s best to not leave one at all and save myself from the eternal embarrassment.
Mood blogger meets crippling anxiety??
The more I force things, the more everything crumbles, and I know I’m most productive when I follow my moods and whims… like, if I want to watch a movie, but force myself to write instead, I’ll get nothing of value done. This has happened WAY more often than I’d care to admit, yet, I still do it in the vain hope that this time I’ll be able to conquer my moods.
Those days when I do get into blog-mode easily are like little gifts from heaven. I get so much done, and I feel all accomplished and stress free. The trouble is they only last a day or two, then my focus shifts to something else and I’m back to square one trying to recapture that wonderful blog-mode that’s so elusive. For the past few weeks I haven’t been in the mood to blog, and I wish I had some other excuse to explain why I’ve been blogging inconsistently, but this is the only thing I’ve been able to come up with to explain why. I’ve fallen so far behind on everyday blogging tasks, and it terrifies me to even begin looking into all I have to do. It doesn’t help that these thoughts trigger my anxiety something fierce.
There are lots of things I love doing; yet, blogging is the only thing I’ve ever felt guilty not doing. Like, I enjoy baking but I don’t feel guilty if I don’t bake for a few weeks. (Actually, the scales would thank me if I don’t bake!) If I didn’t blog for a month or two I know I’d be completely crippled with guilt. I don’t know where the pressure to blog stems from, but it’s something I don’t think will ever fully go away, no matter how hard I try to ignore it.
So, I guess, I haven’t really come to an answer for my question. Do I feel like I’m a mood blogger? Yeah, I sort of do. Do I have any idea on how to overcome this? Heck no! But, I’d love to know what you think about this. Do you think it’s possible to be a mood blogger? Is this an anxiety thing? A procrastination thing? An all of the above thing??